Personal stories
My journey
My daughter was just nine weeks old when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. My world turned upside down when the thrill of motherhood was replaced by an all-consuming fear about my own mortality. Long hospital stays and major surgery meant I couldn’t lift my baby for months. At thirty-nine years old, I underwent a bi-lateral mastectomy and breast reconstruction, then an axiliary lymph node clearance and a short course of chemotherapy.
Soon after being diagnosed, I fought back tears as I contacted all the support organisations I had heard of. Somebody put me in contact with a breast care nurse at the Breast Cancer Foundation of WA and so began my contact with them. Since then I have received ongoing information and advice from the breast care nurse and much-needed support from the counselling service. Towards the end of my chemotherapy treatment, the BCFWA invited me to participate in a pamper day. I received beauty treatments and a makeover, as well as gifts and a professional photo shoot. It was a timely boost to my self-esteem. I have also joined a support group for young women with breast cancer and the BCFWA recently found a volunteer to assist me when I needed help after my final surgery.
My doctors tell me my prognosis is good, but the fear hasn’t faded, and it’s good to know I am not alone on this challenging journey.
Tracy
There is life after breast cancer – I’m living proof!
In my middle years, life was full speed ahead - independent, single and loving it, enrolled in a Uni course, then I was diagnosed with breast cancer - DCIS!
The specialist said I wouldn’t need a mastectomy, a lumpectomy would be sufficient. But it wasn’t, when the pathology report came back there wasn’t a good clearance so a wider excision was recommended. But I knew that I would continue to worry about a recurrence in that breast or even the other breast. Eventually I made the decision to have a bilateral mastectomy, but I was undecided about the reconstruction. In due course I decided to have a latissimus dorsi reconstruction.
It wasn’t easy, I live alone and didn’t have much social support, but I took advice from the Breast Care Nurses and while I was waiting for my surgery I enjoyed some massages and a Pamper Day provided by the BCFWA. And I got through it.
The word “patient” doesn’t really describe me so six weeks after my final surgery (I would have gone earlier if the doctors hadn’t made we wait) I went to China to teach English.
During my time in China, speaking only 20 words of Chinese language, I travelled alone, by train from Beijing to Guangzhou – the north and south of China. What an experience, all this time I hardly thought about breast cancer, the “bionic boobs”, doctors or hospitals. I’m back now, ready to tackle whatever is ahead.
Jan
Did I do something wrong?
Did I eat the wrong the foods? I breast fed my son, could he get the cancer through the milk? These were some of the questions that ran through my mind and the worst thing was that I never had anyone my age to talk too.’
Being diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 27 is the worst blow you could get. “Have a lumpectomy,” they say. What the hell is that? Is it my fault? Did I do something wrong? Did I eat the wrong the foods? I breast fed my son. Could he get the cancer through the milk? These were some of the questions that ran through my mind and the worst thing was that I never had anyone my age to talk to. It was okay to have your parents, friends and family but I wanted someone my age that was married with children.
My worst fear was that I was going to die because when you have cancer you die. That's how I thought. I had never seen anyone with cancer, except my grandfather and he died, so I thought my number was up.
When I turned 30 I was told I had to lose my left breast because the cancer had come back. I had both breasts removed for safekeeping. The questions that came out then were, “will I look like a freak? Will my husband still love me? How will this affect my marriage?”
It was a different ball game this time round. Life was going to be tougher. That’s why I joined The Foundation, because I wanted to help the girls out who were diagnosed as young as me. I didn't want young girls thinking that life was over. I wanted them to realise that they had plenty to live for.
There were other questions like can I have another child? Can they save some eggs in case I have to have chemo? You want someone to answer these questions and you don't want to be alone.
Life can be difficult at times but you know that even being diagnosed with breast cancer, it’s not the end of the world. You still have the whole world to look forward to.
Melina
A Man’s Perspective
She started to cry. She said to me she felt ugly and would understand if I wanted to leave her. I told her that I loved her, and she has me for the rest of her life.
The day I was told that Melina had breast cancer I went into shock. I didn't know what to think. Things started to go around in my head. It happened so fast that I didn't know what to do. It felt like when you are laying slabs. You pick one up and you go to put it down but your fingers get jammed in it. It hurts for a few seconds and the pain is so great that every dirty word under the sun comes out of your mouth.
All I knew is that I had to keep a straight head and keep strong for Melina. I said to myself, “why us?” Melina is so strong and healthy. We have a beautiful baby boy. I remember when she asked me to feel a lump in her breast. I felt it. So off to the doctors she went.
She came back from the doctors and said the tests came back positive. Melina's mum went with her as I was at work. The next thing, Mel’s in hospital for a lumpectomy and to have some lymph nodes removed. I didn't know what lymph nodes were. That was 1997. In 2000 Melina was back in hospital for more surgery. This time told she has to have her left breast removed.
All I remember is Melina crying. She asked me how I felt about having her breast removed? I said you have to do it to get better. Then she said she was going to remove both breasts as a precaution. She started to cry.
I said, “Stop it! As long as you are fine I don't give two hoots about your boobs. As long as you are fine!”
When she came out of hospital we were at home and I could hear her crying and I asked her why? She said to me she felt ugly and she would understand if I wanted to leave her. As a joke I said, ‘you are here. Boobs are there only for fun’ and I told her that I loved her and she has me for the rest of her life. This is why Melina is so special to me because what she had to go through. I don't think I could handle it as well as she did.
Melina is wonderful. She gave me two healthy children on top of dealing with breast cancer. Now Melina does her volunteer work. She helps other women to deal and talk about breast cancer.
As a man and husband who has experienced this issue I urge men to talk to someone. It helped me to, “always look on the bright side of life."
Vince
Support groups have been one of the vital parts of my healing process
Belonging to a breast cancer support group has been one of the vital parts of my healing process.
I first joined in 1997 where I met a group of ladies all diagnosed with breast cancer within 3 to 4 weeks of each other; all of us between the ages of 32 to 41 and we still meet 13 years later. When I was re-diagnosed in 2007 of metastases in my bones, I joined the Advanced Breast Cancer Support Group where I was inspired to meet people who are living with advanced cancer and where I learnt some useful coping skills on how to handle some of the side effects of the treatments I was going through.
I found it safe to express myself, sharing with people who relate. The group has been educational and informative on many topics, all empowering in guiding me to help myself live well with cancer.
MaryAnne